Irregular reinforcement dating
The first rewards will come in the form of peace, once we are no longer governed by their intermittent reinforcement schedules.
We can continually reinforce ourselves with the positive. I joined and began to get personal reinforcement from the articles and the members.
Those on the receiving end are not sure what comes next. Only those doling out the reinforcements know what will be delivered. Conditioning plays a very important role in classroom management, especially among students with behavior concerns.
It is not practical to assume that students should be continually reinforced or punished.
I had to choose to be alone most of the time and find things I wanted to do instead of seeking compassion or care from him. I began to give HIM consequences for abusive behaviors or words. However, now he is seeking to receive my approval for better behavior.
He will never be the love he made himself out to be.
If a behavior is being reinforced, it will occur with increased frequency.If they were always horrible, we would not stick around. However, very often, we want to work through the relationship, feel invested, and truly love the person we are trying so desperately to understand. We are left guessing, never knowing what we are going to get when they walk in the door or call. Likewise, if every time we acted in one particular way, the same response occurred, we would also tire of their dysfunction. That being said, we can promise ourselves not to let the issues progress further.We do not realize that there is a very real force at play, taking control over us. They may act or respond in ways we tend not to expect. We would then have expectations based on concrete information. We come to believe that if only we had done xyz, everything would have been right in the relationship. Abusive individuals make excuses, point fingers, and seem to enjoy the discomfort this brings. We are left guessing, feeling confused, and believing we are responsible for all of the problems related to the situation. We must not engage to the point where we become further wrapped in their dysfunction.Even if we must interact from time to time, we never have to allow them that type of hold over us again.We understand and can reward ourselves with pay-offs that are functional.